He moved slightly, and she went on, with a slight catching of her breath: “It’s a bother and disturbance, but you see—” She had to go through with it now, because she could think of nothing but her preconceived words. For fifteen years!—so long as I can remember! All I wanted was a little love, a caress now and then. Even then she had understood vaguely that she had touched upon some philosophy of life: that one was never lonely when alone, only in the midst of crowds. She was alone, and the mask of her unchanging high spirits was for the moment laid aside. He seated himself before it. This formality irked her: she wanted to play a little, romp. The walls were of immense thickness; the small windows double-grated and unglazed; the fire-place was without a grate; and a barrack-bed, divided into two compartments, occupied one corner. Grandmothers and grandfathers and uncles and aunts … to love and to coddle lonely little girls. The winters were bitter here, they could have just as easily been frozen off. It is repulsive. It might have been the moon, or the phosphorescence of the broken water, or it might have been his abysmal loneliness; but suddenly he caught her face in his hands and kissed her on the mouth. That is why I called myself Anna.
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